by Ariane Cunningham
It is so essential that we set healthy boundaries in our professional lives, our personal lives including friends, family, and associates. No one will set the boundaries you need in your life but you. Setting boundaries can lead to a happier and healthier you. I outline below ways in which you can begin to set healthy boundaries.
1. Know your boundaries. Identify them. Whether it is your personal time or space, consistent negativity from others, or the way in which you allow yourself to be treated. Once you identify your boundaries it is easier to begin to implement your boundaries.
2. Feel empowered to let those around you know your boundaries. In the moment of a behavior that overstep your boundaries, it is OK to say, “I feel the behavior you demonstrated is not OK, and makes me feel uncomfortable. This will make it less likely for the behavior to continue.
3. Stick to your core values and beliefs. Why? Because they make you, YOU. For example, if someone consistently puts others down in your presence or consistently criticizes you, address it with that individual. They may be unaware that their behavior makes you uncomfortable. If they do not respect your boundaries, it may be time to create distance with these individuals. Again, setting boundaries is about your own health and happiness. Those individuals who truly care about you will respect your boundaries.
4. Finally, never let anyone set your boundaries for you. If you wish not to speak with someone after midnight, do not do so. If you do not feel a comfortable need to overly explain a missed call or missed engagement, do not. A simple response, “I was not available, I will try my best to be available soon,” is OK. Do not feel the need to feel boxed in to overly pologize, overly explain ,or justify your actions to someone who is trying to create boundaries for you. This does not mean you need to be rude or callous, but it does mean that to love ourselves and live a happier and stress free life, we can confidently set boundaries with other and kindly let them know when they overstep your boundaries.
Deep Zen Meditation
Setting healthy boundaries for ourselves makes all the difference in our inner peace, happiness, confidence, and feeling worth of self-worth.